


I am not afraid (Of the voices in my head)

by Candace_X_Chambers



Series: WWE vs TNA Mashup [3]
Category: Professional Wrestling, Total Nonstop Action Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Alcoholism, Angst and Tragedy, Betrayal, Depression, Drugged Rape, Kayfabe Compliant, M/M, Panic Attacks, Past Child Abuse, Past Child Neglect, Pining, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Self-Worth Issues, Song lyrics as the title, Sort of an AU, WWE vs TNA mashup, anger management issues, up until the story starts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-01
Updated: 2015-10-28
Packaged: 2018-04-07 02:06:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4245447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Candace_X_Chambers/pseuds/Candace_X_Chambers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <b>(Not your typical Shield break up fic)</b>
</p><p>When Seth smashed that steel chair on Roman's back, he was becoming the person he never wanted to be. But, hey, he figured that if he was going to be this asshole of a prick who would turn his back on his family, then he was going to emulate it after <em>him</em>.</p><p>If he was going to hurt his brothers, then he was going to <em>break</em> himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything. All characters used are property of their respective company; WWE and/or TNA. This story is completely fictional, and has never nor will ever happen. Any insults directed towards any superstar/diva/company/CEO is not my own opinion, nor it is intended to harm said corporation/person, but is used merely to enhance the plot. The title of this fic comes from the song Misery Loves My Company by Three Days Grace, which will serve as Tyler Black's TNA theme song. However, I don't own this song.**

**Warning: depression, anger management issues, a past rapethat will only be described in flashbacks, said one is drugged before rape occurs, alcoholism, past child abuse/neglect that will be referenced a lot, someone is lead on during a relationship**

**A/N: I think this is the darkest thing I have ever - or will ever - write. So, be prepared. For anyone who's read my last two Seth/A.J. fics, you don't need to read the next paragraph because it explains the way this fic goes. It's the same as in those fics (just the basic outline, of course).**

**Tyler's first (and only real) match on TNA was on October 6th, 2006 where he teamed with Jeff Luxon against the Latin American Xchange in a losing effort. We're pretending that, instead of going to ROH the following year and continuing with the indies, he stayed in TNA. Obviously because of this change, I had to alter title reigns and such. However, everything else remains the same - dates, PPVs, roster, anything associated with the Knockouts -. He leaves TNA and goes straight to FCW in 2010, giving him a four year career.**

**Sorry for that being so long, I just wanted everyone to know because this fic and This reality is really just a fucked up dream are my babies and are uber important to me. Ugh. I'm sorry, I'm done. Please leave feedback! Thank you for reading :)**

Chapter One:

_Tyler walks down the ramp. TNA World Heavyweight Championship wrapped around his shoulder, his two best friends by on his left and right, respectively. His jacket flows behind him, capturing the 'King of Goth' look Dixie gave him._

_Bobby pats his shoulder as he ascends the stairs. Tonight, the three of them are taking on A.J. Styles, Jeff Hardy, and Christopher Daniels. Tyler asks if he can go first. Despite the six of them being friends, he isn't to fond of Daniels (the feeling's mutual), who's starting for their opponents. They both nod. Kazarian ruffles his hair before taking his jacket and belt, carefully placing them at ringside, while Bobby kisses the top of his head - their routine that'll never change._

_Tyler and Christopher go at it for a solid five minutes before Jeff gets tagged in. They double team him - much to the crowd's displeasure - before Daniels is forced to get out. Tyler hits his buddy with a swift enzuiguri. He goes for the tag-_

**Gut checked with a chair.**

_-but he's pulled back by the fresh A.J. His partners stare with worried expressions._

**Fake smiles and hugs. Fake pep talks and promises. All of it was a lie.**

_Finally, he breaks free and tags in Frankie. He rolls out of the ring, dropping ungracefully to the mat below. He listens to the sound of feet hitting the ring, skin against skin, while he gathers himself. All the while cheering his best friend on._

**Brass knuckles. One-two-three. He just lost everything.**

_"You okay?" Bobby asks once he's back up on the apron. Tyler smiles, "Better now I saw you."_

**"I hope, Tyler, that you've realised you're not the type of person people actually care about - only pretend to so they can use you. Like I did."**

_Tyler grins as the three of them walk backstage. Kaz chatters excitedly, his arms around their necks. This is the happiest he'll ever be in his life. Hell, he doesn't have a life without these two._

**"I will /never/ trust anyone ever again. Not after what you did to me."**

Seth wakes with a start, sitting up. He takes deep breath after deep breath. Just trying to calm his rapidly beating heart. It was only a dream.. okay, a horrible nightmare that combined the best and worst time of his life. But he doesn't need to freak out about it.

These dreams/flashbacks have been occurring more and more. They used to be every once in a while, but now it's three or four times a week, if not more.

He doesn't know what this means. But he's been having theme since he.. he did the unspeakable.

Maybe it's because that's what _he_ did.

When Seth smashed that steel chair on Roman's back, he was becoming the person he never wanted to be. But, hey, he figured that if he was going to be this asshole of a prick who would turn his back on his family, then he was going to emulate it after _him_.

If he was going to hurt his brothers, then he was going to _break_ himself.

It seemed right, at the time. Now, he's miserable. His heart is broken, he feels empty.

But, if life has taught him anything, that's what he deserves. People like him, who grew up with nothing and continued to be treated worse than dirt, don't have nice things. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is really just a filler chapter. Beware, it might be boring.

**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything. All characters used are property of their respective company; WWE and/or TNA. This story is completely fictional, and has never nor will ever happen. Any insults directed towards any superstar/diva/company/CEO is not my own opinion, nor it is intended to harm said corporation/person, but is used merely to enhance the plot. The title of this fic comes from the song Misery Loves My Company by Three Days Grace, which will serve as Tyler Black's TNA theme song. However, I don't own this song.**

**Warning: depression, anger management issues, a rape happens that will only be described in flashbacks, said one is drugged before rape occurs, alcoholism, past child abuse/neglect that will be referenced a lot, someone is lead on during a relationship**

**A/N: I'm starting to get excited for this fic, and I hope you all are, too. All feedback - whether it be a comment, kudos, bookmark, whatever - is welcomed.**

Chapter Two:

Seth gathers his stuff, shoving whatever he actually decided to take out of his suitcase back into it. He grabs the thing's handle, throwing his duffel bag over his shoulder, and heads out. He pulls out his phone to double check the text from Hunter as he goes into the hotel elevator.

_HHH: arena str8 after drive over, be there @ 6:30 don't be late_

What could Hunter possibly want with him that close to Raw? Ever since he distanced himself from the Authority's lackeys, his boss had left him to his own devices more often than not - unless there was an urgent Authority matter.

But if the boss man needed him, then he'd be there.

~

The drive from Cincinnati to Raw's location doesn't take more than a few hours. Seth listens to his favorite Haste the Day album - When Everything Falls - along the way. Nothing but Jimmy Ryan's words to keep him company.

Finally he arrives at the required destination twenty minutes before six-thirty. He hightails it into the arena to drop his stuff off at his room, and takes out his phone when it vibrates.

_HHH: u here?_

_SR: yes sir_

_HHH: meeting room now_

He doesn't bother replying, just pockets the device, and takes the five minute walk over to the Authority's personal meeting room. Brain running a mile a minute, he contemplates what Hunter might need him for. There have been quite a bit of rumors floating around about Seth and him initiating a feud. Is that what this is? Hunter's way of telling him it's been fun, but it's time to move on? Or, could it be a new title contender? Dean's, hopefully, has been kicked to the back of the line. So, he's going to need a different opponent.

The thought of Brock Lesnar makes his feet still, but he forces himself to keep moving. It's not that Seth's scared of him...

He's fucking terrified of Brock Lesnar.

However, he likes to think that, despite the fact most people within this company doesn't exactly like him, Hunter does appreciate his position in the WWE - as World Heavyweight Champion, and the entitled Golden Boy - enough to tell him something that big. But, you never know when it comes to Triple H.

He reaches the meeting room door and opens it without a second thought. There's no point in psyching himself out, after all.

Maybe he should have, because all of that would've been better than walking into a room with no one but Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns. Hell, he'd rather go to Suplex City right now than walk into that room.

The air is so tense he could choke on it, and the hate filled glares he receives from his former brothers chills him to the bone.

He sits down a few spots away from them - on the opposite side of the table. He isn't suicidal - and puts his attention into scrolling through Instagram. He finds a selfie Gail took with Mickie James and her baby that puts a small smile on his face.

It makes his heart hurt, thinking that if things hadn't gone down the way they had Seth probably would've been there. He keeps in touch with a few of his female companions he met while in TNA - Gail (obviously, he doesn't know what he'd do without her), Mickie, Angelina - but it's not the same as being there with them.

"Find somethin' funny over there, asshole?" Ambrose questions, his voice as icy as his eyes. Seth doesn't bother looking up.

"Just a picture of my friend and her kid."

Ambrose lets out an empty chuckle. "You have those?"

Seth doesn't get the chance to respond - not that he was going to - because the door creaks open, in walks Triple H.

The COO raises his eyebrows. "Still don't like each other, huh?"

Reigns frowns. "Not even a little bit."

"Well, you need to put your differences aside, because you're about to start working together again."

Whoa, whoa. Wait. What? _What?_

"Apparently we've managed to anger a certain company enough to officially declare war." Hunter explains. War? Really? "They've been threatening to do this for years, but we never actually _planned_ on them going through with it-"

"Who the fuck's 'them'?" The Lunatic Fringe interrupts. Smooth. Intrude on your boss's sentence. Real smooth, Ambrose.

The Cerebral Assassin smirks, "Total Nonstop Action Wrestling, Mr. Ambrose.

"You see, their television network, Destination America, is threatening to cancel their show if they don't increase their ratings." Hunter continues. Seth is _totally_ not freaking out on the inside, by the way. Yeah, his heart didn't start rapidly beating once he said 'Total'. "And, due to their lack of income, haven't been able to pay their roster on time - which has caused some major stars to leave, along with others who signed with new companies-. Obviously, the fans-"

The door creaks open, "Sorry I'm late."

Seth's blood runs cold, he _knows_ that country twang.

Slowly he turns his head, and catches an eyeful of A.J. Styles.

Welp, there goes the neighborhood.

"Hey gorgeous." A.J. says, a small smile on his face as he takes the seat next to Seth. He squeezes the man's knee in greeting.

What the fuck is going on here?

"That's alright, Mr. Styles," Hunter replies, "As I was saying. The fans aren't to happy about this, which is causing them to stop purchasing tickets, buying merchandise, etcetera. I'm sure you can see how that would be catastrophic to any company. So, they've decided to come after us, professional wrestling's most profitable company. As a business man, I can't really blame them."

"That's all fine and dandy, fancy pants. But what does that have to do with us? 'Cause that sounds like a personal problem." Ambrose asks, chewing obnoxiously on his gum. Honestly, if Seth wasn't so accustomed to the brunette's behavior, he'd be annoyed by it.

"Of course, Mr. Ambrose, as apart of the WWE, it's your problem, too." Triple H points out, "But, to answer your question, I want you to.. to reunite, basically. Not as the Shield, but as a group of people defending our company from injustice."

"No." Reigns says instantly. Ambrose follows up with a, "Fuck no."

Seth rolls his eyes and sighs, "He wasn't giving you an option. He's telling you what's going to happen."

The COO nods, "Thank you, Seth."

"'m not workin' with that scumbag." Ambrose defies, crossing his arms over his torso. "Can't make me." If he started pouting, Dean Ambrose would finalize his transformation into a child. Seriously, what does this guy not understand? Their boss is not asking them whether they think this is something they'd like to be a part of. He's informing them of an upcoming storyline, and demanding they play along.

"I _can_ , actually. Because if you don't oblige, you'll be fired." Hunter runs a hand over his stubbly hair. "I just need you all to pretend to like each other until the next Pay Per View, where this'll all be settled."

"But that's, like... over a month away." Reigns points out, speaking smooth and slow. He raises his eyebrows as if this task is unbelievably hard and shall never be accomplished.

Is Seth really that difficult to be around? Jeez.

"I realize that, Roman, but I didn't make this up. Creative did." Hunter argues. "They thought that since you all worked so well together before, that you're chemistry along with A.J.'s and Seth's experience from previously working in TNA would give us an advantage. So - I don't give a shit if you never speak to each other off screen, but in front of that camera you better make it look like you're allies. If I even get the slightest hint you're not on the same page, I'll -"

"Hunter, you don't have to worry about that. We'll play nice." A.J. says with a warm, easy smile. It makes Seth smile, too. He forgot how simplistic things are when around his friend.

"Great!" Triple H cheers, clapping his hands together, "You can leave now, but don't you dare breath a damn word about this to anyone. And you'll be sharing a joint hotel that I'll be paying for, personally."

"Yes, Almighty one." Ambrose agrees before he and his brother are rushing off. Seth and A.J. follow a few seconds after. The two toned haired man slings his arm onto the older's shoulders.

"Dude, I've missed you so much." Seth says, grinning stupidly wide. "You never answer my calls."

"I know, man, I've been super busy." A.J. defends himself. "But, since we work together again, I'm never leavin' your side." 

"Wouldn't want it any other way." Seth smiles. Even through his experience in TNA was, for the most part, a dramatic shit storm, A.J. - Gail, Jeff, and his title reigns - made the trip worthwhile.

"I refuse to call you Seth, by the way. You don't look like a Seth, and I'm not sayin' it."


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything. All characters used are property of their respective company; WWE and/or TNA. This story is completely fictional, and has never nor will ever happen. Any insults directed towards any superstar/diva/company/CEO is not my own opinion, nor it is intended to harm said corporation/person, but is used merely to enhance the plot. The title of this fic comes from the song Misery Loves My Company by Three Days Grace, which will serve as Tyler Black's TNA theme song. However, I don't own this song.**

**Warning: depression, anger management issues, a rape happens that will only be described in flashbacks, said one is drugged before rape occurs, alcoholism, past child abuse/neglect that will be referenced a lot, someone is lead on during a relationship**

**A/N: Congratulations EC3!!!!!!!!!!! (I know this is late, but I love Ethan and this makes me happy.) And, the fact that the TNA World Heavyweight Championship isn't considered a legitimate title is beyond ridiculous. But, you go Ethan! <3**

**Sorry for another boring chapter. Things will be getting intense in chapter four as I begin the flashbacks (accompanied by songs that fit the mood) begin.**

**Please, leave any feedback.**

Chapter Three:

Seth is a mixed bag of emotions all throughout RAW. They had A.J. go back to their joint hotel room. That way, if someone unexpected walked into Seth's room, no one would see him.

So, Seth's basically glued himself to his seat while he watches the show - simultaneously texting his former best friend (or is it his best friend, again?) - and he's anxious. Ugh. His match is the main event against Reigns. It's _killing_ him, because he's so excited.

He's not excited for the fact that he has to work with his former Shield brothers (only because they hate him still, not because he doesn't love them - because he does), and because.. well.. TNA.

After a near shudder at the thought, Seth tells himself to stop being a baby. It's been five years, the chance that _he's_ even still there is slim, especially if the company is sinking.

He has a few minutes before he's required to go out, so he decides to just ask.

Asking can't hurt, right?

_SR: does he still work there?_

_A.J.: holy shit, did you mentally block your eyes from seeing his name or something?_

_SR: ...maybe_

_A.J.: he's been calling you out dude  
A.J.: we'll watch the videos on YouTube after the show. Go knock em dead sweet cheeks_

Seth deposits his phone back into his bag and makes his way down to the curtain....

_Bobby kisses the top of his head, tucking Tyler's hair behind his ear, and presses their foreheads together. "I love you so much. Knock 'em dead, babe."_

Shaking the memory from his head, Seth buckles his World Heavyweight Championship around his waist, and waits for his music to hit.

~

Bray Wyatt officially fucking sucks.

Seth and Reigns were having a good match - neither had anyone in their corner because Dean would never interfere in their match, and because the only person who remotely likes Seth at the moment is Triple H - when Wyatt's stupid music (it's actually really cool, but not the point) started playing, the lights went out, and he hit Reigns with a Sister Abigail.

Not only did Seth lose the match, it was by a fucking disqualification. And he had to watch that creep sing "I'm a little teapot" while Seth slipped back to his room.

Jesus fucking christ, this night -

_buzz_

Seth rolls his eyes. What could anyone possibly want with him?

_A.J.: hurry up I'm lonely :'(_

Oh, yeah. TNA invasion thing, old best friend back in town. Totally forgot about that.

He doesn't bother replying (simply because then the older would scold him for taking even longer by doing so), and dresses back into his street clothes. After tying his hair up in a bun, he double checks he has everything and heads to the parking lot.

~

A.J. is sitting on one of the beds of their fancy hotel room - the Authority decided to go all out, apparently - a laptop in front of him. He doesn't even acknowledge Seth's presence, just keeps on scrolling.

"Find what you're looking for?" Seth asks, throwing his bag on the ground. Shucking off his jacket, he climbs on the bed next to his friend. He sees the video is already loaded, and he was reading the comments.

"Some." A.J. says, turning the volume up. "Ready? It might get nasty."

The Iowan doesn't get the chance to respond before the door is swinging open. Reigns and Ambrose stalk in, matching scowls on their faces. Neither one seem to care that the two men already in the room are, more or less, cuddling.

Ambrose declares, his voice ice cold, that he's taking a shower. Reigns follows suit. Seth can barely stop his eyes from rolling. These two can't even stand being in the same room with him.

Hell, if he can put up with living in the same area code as Bobby Roode, then these assholes can spend a few weeks in the same sleeping space with Seth Rollins.

Seriously. It's been over a year. How can they _still_ be this pissed off at him? Seth, honestly, isn't even mad at Roode anymore - just extremely hurt and drastically confused.

See? He's made better progress than they have.

Reigns sits on his bed - the one at the end of the room - and pulls out his phone. Like Rollins had done earlier, he puts all of his attention into the device.

"How many are there?" Seth asks, cringing at the number of people who have tried to contact him.

"Most of them aren't tryna fight ya. Some are askin' you to come back." A.J. replies, shaking his head, "Would save the company, y'know. You used to be a bring in the big bucks. Comin' back would be, like, Christmas to 'em."

"I don't think I'd ever work there again. Not after how I left."

**"Hey, Tyler." Kaz greets, smiling. "I heard you got yourself a brand new title. Congrats... I also heard you betrayed your so-called brothers to get there. Gotta say, didn't think you had it in ya. But I'm honestly glad to see you actually listened to us.**

**"I don't like you, but I do respect what you did for TNA, and all the shit you accomplished here. I'd hate to see you turn into one of those useless, soft, assholes you work with." Kazarian says. "Tyler Black.. I want you to come back down to the only place that's ever accepted a nobody like you, and I want to be the first one to step in the ring with you. If you don't, I understand.. You were Bobby's bitch, now you're Triple H's, huh? Well, wouldn't wanna upset daddy, he might spank ya."**

Seth groans. Why do people keep saying that? Hunter is a happily married man, why would he fuck Seth on the side? He's committed to Stephanie McMahon, for fuck's sake.

Seth snuggles closer to A.J., laying his head directly on the other's chest. The Phenomenal One threads his fingers through his locks, soothing him.

"You wanna watch.." A.J.'s eyes roam the screen, "Aries, Bully Ray, or Jeff?"

"Jeff."

A.J. hums, "He misses you, a lot. Talks about payin' you a visit."

"Why didn't he?"

"Didn't wanna trigger somethin'," Styles replies, his voice quiet as the video buffers, "Damn psycho." The two toned haired man snorts. Yeah, shit got crazy there towards the end.

**Jeff taps his fingers together. "I used to know this guy. Some say he's my best friend, but he's more than that. He's my brother.**

**"Seth Rollins, it really hurt when you pushed me away... but I still love you. You're still my dorky, adorable as fuck lil' brother." Jeff smiles. "I miss you, man. We all do... That's why I want you to come back home. Just ain't the same without ya.**

**"Besides, you never told me if you were a top or a bottom. 'Cause if Bobby's dick went anywhere near you, I'll cut it off."**

Seth doesn't stop the corners of his lips from turning up. Jeff Hardy, his overprotective big brother.

"Prepared for the nasty of the nasty?"

"Ugh. Never."

A.J. just chuckles, and presses play.

**"There are a lot of pathetic, untalented, lowlife employees over at the WWE. Everyone already knows that sleazy scum bags like to hire their equal, eh? But I couldn't care less about them.**

"But I'm here to call out World Heavyweight Champion, Seth Rollins," Bobby frowns, "You don't look like a Seth."

"Why do people keep saying that?" Seth asks, rolling his eyes.

"'Cause it's true, Ty." A.J. answers.

**"For anyone that's followed Rollins's career, well. I'm sure you know about how he ran out of TNA with his tail tucked between his legs." Roode chuckles, "Seth Rollins is, and always will be, a little bitch. He's to scared to fight _real_ men. Look at how he ran away from Frankie Kazarian and I.**

**"You know, Seth, I'd ask if you had any balls, but I already know you do, baby." Roode gives a shit eating smirk. "Instead, I'm going to give you a challenge. Bring your fine ass down here to TNA, the best wrestling company on the planet, and I might just step in the ring with you. Show you what a _real_ man looks like."**

"Well, then." A.J. says, clearing his throat. "That was pleasant."

"Yeah." Seth agrees, laying his head on his friend's shoulder. "I still don't get why he did it."

A.J. huffs, wrapping an arm around the other man's shoulders. Pulling Seth against his side, he starts searching for more videos. "Beats me. What we had - what you two had - was close to fuckin' perfect. Why anyone would throw it away is just.."

"Hey, is that Kurt?"

"..You wanna watch Kurt?"

"Yes!"


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything. All characters used are property of their respective company; WWE and/or TNA. This story is completely fictional, and has never nor will ever happen. Any insults directed towards any superstar/diva/company/CEO is not my own opinion, nor it is intended to harm said corporation/person, but is used merely to enhance the plot. The title of this fic comes from the song Misery Loves My Company by Three Days Grace, which will serve as Tyler Black's TNA theme song. However, I don't own this song.**

**Warning: depression, anger management issues, a past rape that will only be described in flashbacks, said one is drugged before rape occurs, alcoholism, past child abuse/neglect that will be referenced a lot, someone is lead on during a relationship, pining, panic attacks**

**A/N: I'm sure you're all expecting these flashbacks to be monumentally sad, but this isn't true. There will be a handful that are happy, though not very many. This chapter's pine filled flashback is played to the tune of Smile by Uncle Kracker.**

**Please leaves kudos, bookmarks, or a comment. Enjoy! :)**

Chapter Four:

The official press release (a.k.a. a Tweet and Facebook post from the WWE's account) that the four men - Seth, A.J., Reigns, Ambrose - and four women - Natalya, Nikki Bella, Paige, Sasha Banks - will be invading the Impact arena later that night will be posted moments before they're scheduled to make an appearance.

Seth is nervous.. sort of. He left behind a trail of destruction when he left so suddenly. The consequences of that might come out.. and there's also the possibility (fact) that he might (will) see Roode, and he isn't sure what to expect.

He's also, strangely enough, very excited. TNA is _his_ house. Taking it back will be a blessing.

Plus, A.J.'s by his side. Seth can do anything with A.J. to keep him in line.

~

_[ You're better than the best. I'm lucky just to linger in your light. Cooler than the flip-side of my pillow (that's right). Completely unaware. Nothing can compare to where you send me It lets me know that it's okay (yeah, it's okay). And the moments when my good times start to fade.]_

_There's something about Bobby Roode that draws Tyler in. It's like a beautiful toxin that he can't get enough of. A dangerous attraction that lifts him to a state of euphoria, and sends him right back down._

_It's not okay to feel this way about Bobby Roode, his best friend and strongest ally. Not only is Bobby nearly a decade older than him, but he's the only person who Tyler genuinely trusts in this entire world. The man took the young rookie under his wing, made Tyler strong. Without Bobby, who knows where he'd be. Crushing on him is just...._

_[You make me smile like the sun, Fall outta bed, Sing like a bird, Dizzy in my head, Spin like a record, Crazy on a Sunday night. You make me dance like a fool, Forget how to breathe Shine like gold, Buzz like a bee. Just the thought of you can drive me wild. Oh, you make me smile.]_

_Tyler Black is probably one of the most attractive people Bobby's ever met. It's weird to say, considering the kid is only nineteen while he's close to thirty. He's pathetic, he knows. Liking someone he has no chance with._

_But Tyler isn't just attractive physically, but his personality is just as magnificent. His eyes are so clear, so bright. His smile lights up a room - simultaneously driving Bobby insane-. And he smells so damn good...._

_[Even when you're gone. Somehow you come along. Just like a flower poking through the sidewalk crack. And just like that, you steal away the rain, and just like that.]_

_Tyler talks to Bobby every two seconds, if he can manage. Hearing the man's voice is.. it sends shivers down his spine, the way it flows over him. The tales he tells about his adventures before meeting Tyler are phenomenal. He feels even closer to Bobby each night they share a bed, staying up late into the night just to talk._

_He's never felt like this before...._

_[You make me smile like the sun, Fall outta bed, Sing like a bird, Dizzy in my head, Spin like a record, Crazy on a Sunday night. You make me dance like a fool, Forget how to breathe Shine like gold, Buzz like a bee. Just the thought of you can drive me wild. Oh, you make me smile.]_

_Bobby hangs onto everyone of Tyler's words like his life depends on it. Hearing about his friend's past brings tears to his eyes. Every story Tyler tells about when his step dad hit him, or his mother went on a drunken rampage, makes Bobby want him to pull him close - hide the young man from all the world's evils - until the memories went away._

_He's never wanted to protect someone before...._

_[Don't know how I lived without you, 'cause every time that I get around you I see the best of me inside your eyes. You make me smile.]_

_A.J. Styles once told him that he looks at Bobby as if the man holds Tyler's world in his hands. He's starting to think maybe Bobby does - but not his world, just his heart._

_He's never been in love before, but he's watched movies where people fell in love. That's.. that what this feels like. A cheesy yet cute romance movie that has a predictable yet heart warming ending._

_At night, Tyler dreams that they, too, will have a happy ending. Then he wakes up in the morning and remembers that just not how life works. Life, at least for him, isn't pretty - it's not sweet, it's not magical, it's not /nice/ -. No. It's ugly, brutal, tear jerking. It's mean, rude, dark, and hopeless.._

_But he can still smile like his dreams could, one day, come true._

~

There's something about walking into the Impact arena that just feels _right_.

Maybe it's because A.J.'s been talking non-stop the entire ride, his favorite Three Days Grace album playing in the back ground. His black leather jacket wrapped around his biceps, glasses perched on the bridge of his nose because he doesn't like driving without them. Just like the old days...

Or, maybe, it's because he knows he's going to go in there and steal the goddamn show like he did every night for four straight years.

"You should come out to your old song, watch everyone flip their shit." A.J. says, a small smirk on his face. Seth snorts, that'd be something to see. "Your new song is shit."

"Hey! There's nothin' wrong with it!"

Styles rolls his eyes, "It's just music, dude. That's so lame."

"Since when?" Seth asks. There have been numerous wrestlers, all amazing in their own right, who have came out to theme songs with no words. Stone Cold, Roddy Piper, Daniel Bryan, Bret Hart, Undertaker, Kane, The Shield, etc. "Do you know how many Hall of Famers didn't come out to lyrics?"

"It's so much cooler to be able to sing your own song, though."

"Don't you dare even start singing. I will hurt you."

A.J. winks, "Kinky."

Seth is about to say something smart back, but is cut off by the sight of Reigns and Ambrose standing outside their locker room. Ambrose is snarling, with Reigns trying to calm him down.

"Do you think you're gonna get cheered?" A.J. asks, scooting past them and into the room.

"Don't even know, man. It'd be weird not to, considering I've always been a face here." Seth answers, dropping his duffel bag to the bench. "But I've gotten accustom to the boos. So, I think either way I'll be shocked."

A.J. nods, "Y'know, I was thinkin' about wearin' my Ric Flair robe 'cause it's so comfy."

"Ooh, do you have it?" Seth asks. He's so in love with that blue, feathered covered piece of heaven. "'Cause it may disappear one day..."

"If you can hide that monstrosity, you can have it." Styles says, "It's so hard to fold with all the feathers and shit in the way."

The door swings open, "..You're such a fuckin' dick." Ambrose scoffs, rolling his eyes. Reigns just huffs, sitting beside the lunatic- on the other side of the room.

Really? No progress has been made in the past twenty hours?

"Are you gonna sleep in it?" The Phenomenal One questions, the corners of his lips turning up slightly.

"You don't?"

"Sometimes." A.J. snorts.

" _Sometimes_? You're not doing Ric Junior justice."

A.J. laughs, "You named my damn robe?"

"You didn't?"

"Will you stop doing that?"

"Doing what?"

"Questioning everythin' I say."

Seth thinks it over. "Nah, I think I'm good."

"You're such a dick." A.J. chirps. "Don't know why I like you."

"Aw, you like me? That's so adorable." Seth wipes an imaginary tear away.

"Fuck you." A.J. pinches the bridge of his nose.

"I don't think your wife would be to happy with this."

"When this is all over, you're dead. I hope you know that." Styles teases, an amused look in his eyes.

Yep, just like old times.

~

There's definitely something about the Impact arena that gets his spirits high, but there's something about seeing _him_ that rubs him the wrong way. It's pathetic as fuck, because _he's_ just standing there, EC3 on his right and Aries on his left. Not speaking, letting Ethan do all the talking for him.

And it completely pisses Seth off.

But he's made progress, okay? A) they're in the same building and B) Seth hasn't sprinted down to the ring to smack that stupid fucking smirk off _his_ face. See? He's doing so well.

Reigns and Ambrose haven't even looked his way during the duration of the show. They're supposed to be working together, that's not going to work out well if one half of their team refuses to speak to the other half.

That's at the back of his mind. He has to focus on the enemy now.

"You ready for this?" A.J. asks, tapping Seth's wrists. Seth nods, and rests his forehead against the shorter man's.

"If I'm prepared to attack him, stop me. I don't wanna lose my cool tonight." Seth whispers, closing his eyes.

"Got your back, man." A.J. steps back, holding out his fists for a double fist bump. "Just like old times?" The Iowan smiles, bumping their knuckles.

"Well, in the great words of Sting.. it's showtime." Seth nudges A.J. out once his song hits.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything. All characters used are property of their respective company; WWE and/or TNA. This story is completely fictional, and has never nor will ever happen. Any insults directed towards any superstar/diva/company/CEO is not my own opinion, nor it is intended to harm said corporation/person, but is used merely to enhance the plot. The title of this fic comes from the song Misery Loves My Company by Three Days Grace, which will serve as Tyler Black's TNA theme song. However, I don't own this song.**

**Warning: depression, anger management issues, a past rape that will only be described in flashbacks, said one is drugged before rape occurs, alcoholism, past child abuse/neglect that will be referenced a lot, someone is lead on during a relationship, pining, panic attacks**

**A/N: I haven't updated in a while, my apologies for that. I'm still trying to configure an actual plot around the scenes that are floating around in my head, while writing This reality is really just a fucked up dream (a.k.a. my baby) because I finally got that fic to the part I've been dying to write. So, all of my works are taking a back seat to Reality until it gets finished.**

**For now, please enjoy this update. Please read, kudos, comment, and subscribe. Thank you all for giving this entire universe the time of day.**

Chapter Five:

"Ethan, I'm sick and tired of you always runnin' your mouth. No one cares about what your sayin'. So, do us all a favor and shut up." A.J. says, looking up at the TNA World Champion. Ethan turns to Dixie, giving her an exasperated look.

What a little bitch.

"I'm not sure if you forgot.. but you don't work here anymore, A.J. And if your lookin' for a job, disrespecting my nephew is a bad way to start negotiations." Dixie says, doing a good job of pretending to be confused.

"I didn't forget. And I certainly don't want to be a part of this ratchet company." A.J. chirps, "No offense to the fans." Seth smiles a little. Disrespectful little shit, vintage Styles.

"Then what the hell are you doin' here?" The TNA President questions, raising her pencilled in eyebrows.

A.J. gives her a look. "You don't know?" She gives him a 'stop being an asshole' look (a.k.a. Tyler Black's look). "My new boss - the biggest billionaire in Connecticut - " the crowd boos "and his family don't appreciate you slimy bastards bad mouthin' his employees. So, he sent me and some other bad asses down here to shut y'all's traps up, for good."

Dixie's eyes nearly fall out of her sockets from how wide they're open. "You thought you could just come out here, and interrupt my show?" The Phenomenal One nods, smirking. "Well, you can't. I refuse to let you walk into my house and -"

"This ain't your house. Hasn't been since a certain someone had his first match here in 2006 and stole the damn show every night after that." The crowd cheers loudly. Seth bites down his smile, rubbing his thumb against his logo on his belt. He's not a modest guy by any means, but hearing his (former?) best friend talk about him like Seth owns this building over A.J. himself just humbles him.

"We all know Tyler Black hasn't worked here in over five years when he was injured after his unsuccessful title defense," Dixie begins, stopping when the fans show their displeasure, "and the last I heard of him, he just crawled out of Iowa and was headed to a WWE tryout. The minute he did that, he lost all of this ''control'' everyone claimed he had.

"Besides, you can't own somethin' you never fight for." Dixie concludes, looking proud of herself.

Uh, yeah you can. Just ask Brock Lesnar.

"He hasn't shown up in five years, and it's not gonna change tonight."

A.J. smiles again, "You sure about that?"

"Yes I am. That makes the Impact arena _my house_ , and I'm demandin' you leave." Dixie hisses, her cheeks turning red. " _Now._ Before Ethan and The Dirty Heels _make you_." Ethan, Aries, and _him_ flex their muscles, trying to look intimidating.

"I can kick all of their asses, and you know it." A.J. challenges, completely unfazed by the bigger men in front of him despite the fact they could easily take him down, "But I don't wanna do that, not tonight... At least not alone."

"I hope you know I hate you." Dixie snaps, narrowing her eyes. The crowd 'What?'s, making the older woman become even more ticked off. "But I'll play along with your stupid, petty little game, A.J., 'cause I know how desperate you are for the spotlight. So, why don't you bring one of your overrated, pathetic excuse of a wrestler, tag alongs out here for tonight's main event against The Dirty Heels after Ethan destroys Shark Boy, and get the _hell_ out of my ring."

The Phenomenal One smiles triumphantly, saluting her on his way down the ramp. He's definitely whistling, practically skipping. Seth would be laughing his ass off if it wasn't for the fact that there's actually someone here named _Shark Boy_. What the actual fuck? That's completely ridiculous. He knows TNA is doing pretty bad (or, so he's told), but that's just low. Unless he's a prepubescent Taylor Lautner, that's - just - wow.

A.J. is humming (legit humming, he can't make this shit up) when he comes back to the locker room. He struts over to Seth and drapes his body over the other man, singing some Clay Aiken song that Seth's heard before.

"What the hell are you doing?" The Iowan asks hesitantly, patting his overly clingy friend's arm. Styles kisses the top of his head.

"I'm makin' ya happy, ain't I?" A.J. questions, brushing the younger's hair behind his ear. "And I'm distractin' ya before your over productive mind starts goin' into overdrive."

"I appreciate the sentiment, but I don't need it. I buried that monster a while ago." Seth says, prying his long time friend's limbs away. While that may or may not be true, he's learned to deal with _that_ shitstorm on his own way back when. Besides, it's been five years - six since it all went down - while the anger is still there, certainly _his_ hold over Seth has disappeared. "I'm a big boy, A.J., I can handle myself."

He'll just have to wait to find out, and he'll deal with whatever happens afterwards. It can't be to bad, right?

"I know that, but if we makes you cry one more time I swear in the name of God -"

"Someone made you cry?"

Reigns's voice stuns the room into a tense silence. Seth looks at the Samoan, and his heart aches when he sees the deep and honest concern shining clear as day through his grey contact lenses. Rollins gulps, he hadn't expected that.

"No.. not recently. A while ago, it's not really a big deal." Seth lies, voice wavering (this is the first time he's spoken to either of his former brothers in over a year without malice or inevitably getting punched afterwards, he's allowed to be a bit nervous). When did he become so accustom to automatically bullshitting people?

Styles flicks his ear. "Did you seriously not tell them anythin'?"

"..I don't like talking about it.."

"Weren't y'all like, a family? When did ya turn into such a damn hypocrite?" A.J. asks. Seth opens his mouth to defend himself - what happened with the Shield and back then with the King of Cowardice are two different things and aren't at all similar - Ethan's match has ended and Aries is calling them out.

"If somethin' goes wrong out there, y'all got our backs?" A.J. asks. Reigns nods, looking wary and (adorably) concerned at Seth. He decides to wrap his belt around his shoulder rather than his waist, like he did back in the old days.

A.J. stops him right before the curtain, and presses their foreheads together. "Whatever he does or says, don't let it get to ya. It's all a mind game."

_[Everybody get ready to fly. I am, I am.]_

A.J. goes out first, and it's not long before the heavy base of Seth's music is thudding from the speakers. Seth emerges to a low boo, then it turns to confusion.

"Oh my god. Is that - is that _Tyler Black_?" Taz yells from the commentator's booth, "Holy crap! It is!"

The crowd starts to mark the fuck out, screaming their heads off, having heard Taz's words. A.J. grins at him.

In the ring, Aries and.. ugh.. _Roode_ (this about making progress, eh?) stand still, unstrapping their Tag belts from around their waists. Seth steps between the ropes, and gets in Roode's face, smirking. The fans love it, getting even louder.

"Still think you're better than me?" Seth growls, patting the WWE logo on his belt. Asshole doesn't respond, just backs away into his corner.

TNA Superstars have gone soft, apparently. Running away from confrontation.

"You first." Seth says, motioning for A.J. to go against Aries.

~

"And your winners by disqualification, A.J. Styles and Seth Rollins."

If Lillian Garcia was here, she'd probably say that through the chaos currently happening in the ring. Not that Dean could bring himself to care when he's beating down this poor, bald sap (who's notably wearing eyeliner). In the middle of all this - not just the current beatdown, but this whole experience - hearing a familiar voice would be welcoming.

Bald fuckface and long haired douche bag decided to interrupt the match when Rollins had been aiming for the Skywalker (Sethwalker, whatever) on Aries (who Dean very much dislikes). Roman told him to get up and run for it.

Shaved head guy slithers out of his grasp, clutching onto long haired dude for dear life. Roman hits Aries with a Superman Punch, and the other guy who Dean doesn't know pulls him out of the ring. Dean bumps his knuckles against his brother's, patting his shoulder for a job well done.

Styles is hugging Rollins, who's kneeling on the canvas. Rollins is panting, looking wounded. Probably because he took the majority of the attack before the odds evened out.

Rollins has this strange look in his eyes, and he's staring down Aries's tag partner.

"I don't know who the hell you think you are, Seth Rollins. Coming into TNA, acting like you deserve to be here. You gave up that right when you signed with the big leagues, sweetheart." Aries's tag team partner says, panting. He looks strangely familiar, but Dean can't think of his name. "It's been awhile since you were here, as everyone knows at this point. But I thought you would've remembered the lesson Kaz and I taught you.

"Seth, you're not the kind of guy people actually like. No, you're the person who others use for their own personal benefit, and dump you." Douche face smirks. "Your dead beat daddy left when you were just a little kid because he knew, your mother drunk herself to death because she knew, and your step dad beat you because he knew. Sooner or later, A.J. will, too. You're a nobody, no matter what you wanna call yourself. People don't love you, they don't like you. These people cheer for you because they're to biased to see that without Bobby Roode, you wouldn't be anywhere in the wrestling business." That was incredibly harsh. "Ecentually, everyone will turn on you -because you're an unwanted nobody- and you'll come crawling back to my feet like the pathetic, worthless bitch you are."

Roode drops his mic, smirking like a dick, and leaves.

Dean throws Rollins a glance. The Iowan is still kneeling - but he looks defeated, heart broken - and A.J. all but lifts him to his feet. Rollins comes out of whatever trance he's in and exits the ring by himself. His shoulders are slumped, though, and he walks like he doesn't have a purpose.

Roman looks about ready to mutilate that Bobby Roode guy. Overprotective asshole. Even after all of this, Roman stilll finds the need to protect the weasel.

Honestly, at this moment, Dean does, too. If anyone has hurt Seth like that (plus those words were seriously rude and uncalled for), they deserve to get beat.

He still has no idea what he's doing though..

~

**A/N: Probably wasn't my best work, but it's yhree a.m. and I want this posted before I go to sleep. Still, I hope you all enjoyed!**

**P.S. How bout that PPV Sunday night?**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything. All characters used are property of their respective company; WWE and/or TNA. This story is completely fictional, and has never nor will ever happen. Any insults directed towards any superstar/diva/company/CEO is not my own opinion, nor it is intended to harm said corporation/person, but is used merely to enhance the plot. The title of this fic comes from the song Misery Loves My Company by Three Days Grace, which will serve as Tyler Black's TNA theme song. However, I don't own this song.**

**Warning: depression, anger management issues, a past rape that will only be described in flashbacks, said one is drugged before rape occurs, alcoholism, past child abuse/neglect that will be referenced a lot, someone is lead on during a relationship, pining, panic attacks, unprotected sex**

**A/N: Well, I'm updating again. Not quite sure why I've had such a strong urge to write this chapter (or the specific scene in this chapter), but I have. The song used in this chapter's flashback is Because of You by Kelly Clarkson. Beware, it's monumentally sad. You might need tissues..**

**I hope you all enjoy! Read, comment, kudos, bookmark, subscribe - do whatever you feel is necessary. I can't wait for the feedback. Thank you for taking the time to read this!**

Chapter Six:

Seth sighs, changing into his street clothes. He just finished drying his hair after taking the first shower. A.J. hasn't said much to him since the show ended. Being the main person who truly understood what Seth had gone through back then, he knew he needed some space when Roode had to go and say shit like that.

Would've it have been to much to ask for, to just let Seth have this one night? That's all he wanted. To just feel like he's in the right place, and to bask in the glory of it all. Then Roode had to open his big fucking mouth and talk about the past like it's the easiest thing in the world.

Seth still can't believe he had been so _stupid_ \- so blinded by his love for the older man. He'd gone nineteen years without trusting a damn soul, why was Bobby Roode so different? Why did Seth feel the need to tell Bobby Roode his deepest, darkest secrets that he vowed never to speak of?

He leans his head against the bathroom wall, having already finished dressing. Before they left the arena, he already decided that he needed to clear his head. So, after his shower, he plans on going to the hotel bar for a drink (read: find Roode and give him a piece of his mind). A.J. was hesitant when Seth first told him on the ride back to the hotel (never expressed it with words, but his body spoke for him), but eventually agreed.

Sighing, Seth forces himself to leave the bathroom. Pulling on his coat, and slipping into his shoes, he gives A.J. a peck on the head and promises to "be safe".

Safety doesn't seem like a big concern right now.

~

_[ I will not make the same mistakes that you did._  
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery.  
I will not break the way you did, you fell so hard.  
I've learned the hard way to never let it get that far.] 

_Tyler leans onto Kaz, using his brother's - his only brother - body as support. His body aches, on the inside and out. The overwhelming pain starts to squeeze around his heart, making his eyes prickle with tears._

_[Because of you,_  
I never stray too far from the sidewalk.  
Because of you,  
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt.  
Because of you,  
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me.  
Because of you,  
I am afraid.] 

_Once in their locker room, Tyler pushes Kaz away from him (though it isn't very hard considering the fight is leaving his body) and steps away from him. The tears start to flow freely down his cheeks, his chest constricting so he can barely breath. He thinks he's hitting something, possibly screaming. But he can't feel it._

_He can't feel anything besides his broken heart._

_[I lose my way._  
And it's not too long before you point it out.  
I cannot cry, because I know that's weakness in your eyes.  
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh everyday of my life.  
My heart can't possibly break when it wasn't even whole to start with.] 

_Didn't they mean anything? Didn't Tyler mean something to him?_

_Bobby is the love of his life, the person he wanted to grow old with. How could it all have been a lie?_

_[Because of you,_  
I never stray too far from the sidewalk.  
Because of you,  
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt.  
Because of you,  
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me.  
Because of you,  
I am afraid.] 

_Tyler has dealt with some horrible shit in his life, but he's never felt so worthless - unwanted, pathetic, idiotic - than he does in this moment. He trusted Bobby with his life, would've taken a bullet for him. Then Bobby goes and throws everything he's ever given - love, brotherhood, secrets, his heart, his life - and squashed it under his boot like it meant nothing._

_[I watched you die._  
I heard you cry every night in your sleep.  
I was so young.  
You should have known better than to lean on me.  
You never thought of anyone else.  
You just saw your pain.  
And now I cry in the middle of the night  
for the same damn thing.] 

_Maybe Tyler really is nothing. No one in his family loved him, Bobby apparently never cared about him. The only friends he has left are A.J., Jeff, Gail and Frankie - never had anyone else, no one ever gave him the time of day -. How long are they going to stay?_

_How does Tyler even know if their friendship is genuine? For all he knows, they're just using him - like Bobby did - and will leave him. They could be just hanging onto him for a free ride to the top, then they'll turn. Isn't that how this business works? There are no real alliances in Impact, right?_

_If he doesn't have friends here, and he certainly doesn't have any anywhere else. Then he could just kill himself and no one would care.._

_[Because of you,_  
I never stray too far from the sidewalk.  
Because of you,  
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt.  
Because of you,  
I try my hardest just to forget everything.  
Because of you,  
I don't know how to let anyone else in.  
Because of you,  
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty.  
Because of you,  
I am afraid.] 

_He feels Frankie's arms wrap around him, pulling Tyler against his chest. He goes limp, tears rolling down his cheeks. The adrenaline disappears from his body, and he feels the pain from Bobby's beat down course throughout his body. They slide down onto the ground, leaning against the wall. Tyler sobs, his body shaking with the force, as he feels a panic attack coming on._

_He pulls Frankie closer to him. All he can do is pray his brother will never see what a useless, waste of life he is and leave - or, maybe whatever he's using Tyler for won't come for a while and he can cherish their time together - because he can't lose what little family he has left._

_Tyler tries to shut his eyes to relax himself, but the image of Bobby's eyes - cold and full of hate - flashes across his mind, and his words ring through Tyler's ears, sending him into a panic attack._

_"I never loved you."_

~

Seth had gone down to the receptionist and asked for Roode's room number, and the guy gave it to him easily. Now, he's just waiting for the asshole to open the door.

"Can I help -" Roode begins as he opens the door - wearing nothing but a pair of sweatpants like the narcissistic douche bag he is, acting like people wanna see that - but stops when he spots who it is. His eyes widen in surprise.

Seth shoves his hands in his large, jacket pockets and pushes past the coward into the room. The section where his arm touched Roode's bare chest through the wool fabric lights up, tingling his skin, but he ignores.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" Seth questions, glaring at the asshole.

Roode raises his eyebrows. "Considering you barged into my hotel room at one thirty in the morning, I could ask the same question."

"You're such a fuckin' asshole."

"What are you doing here?" Roode sighs. "Cause if you're here just to call me names you can leave."

"I want to know why you had to say that." Seth explains. "You didn't have to say a damn thing, yet you did. That isn't fucking okay."

"Would you like me to apologize?"

"Tell me _why_." Seth hisses. He feels his temperature rise as his blood boils. "Why do you think no one wants me, huh? What did I ever do to make you think no one loves me?"

"If you wanted to have an adult conversation, you could've waited until morning. I'm not exactly dressed appropriately." Roode says, gesturing to himself. Seth looks (because he's an idiot), and takes a bit to long reaching the other's eyes. The surprise intensifies, and a smirk begins to etch onto his face. "You like what you see?"

Seth rolls his eyes, "No. Stop being a dick and answer me."

"You know, you look hot. You should take that jacket off." Roode says, randomly, stepping into Seth's space. The Iowan takes a step back, the back of his legs hitting the couch.

"Stay away from me." Seth snarls, glaring. Roode ignores him, getting closer. The Canadian reaches up, taking the collar of Seth's jacket in his hands. Slowly, he slides it down Seth's shoulders, fingers brushing against his arms.

"You really work out now, eh?" Bobby asks, his breath hot. He takes the jacket and throws it on the couch. He places his hands on Seth's shoulders, burning his skin through his shirt.

Seth shudders, placing his hands on Roode's chest to push him away. Roode smiles, tilting his head so their lips are inches from each other's.

"No one knows how to handle someone like you - no one but me - and it's better if you let them go." Bobby whispers.

"Why'd you do it then - all of it?"

You're a diamond. A precious, beautiful diamond who sparkles when it's under pressure. When I said that, it brought out the best in you - you always shine the brightest when you're trying to prove me wrong." Roode whispers.

Seth gasps, his breathing coming in short, frequent inhalations. He feels like he's falling, drowning, and Roode's the only thing holding him up.

"Bobby." Seth moans, his voice broken - just like his heart.

Well, he's definitely going to have to apologize to A.J. for lying, he's so not over it.

"Tell me what you want, baby, and I'll give it to you."

Seth should leave, tell Roode to get away from him. This is a horribly stupid idea.

"Fuck me." Seth pleads.

Oh fuck no. That's - that's a really bad and downright stupid idea. What the hell is he thinking? Who the hell gave his mouth permission to speak? He certainly didn't.

Roode groans, smashing their lips together. Seth, being a weak, useless piece of crap who apparently doesn't know how to use the word 'no' kisses back, better than what he's getting, and throws his arms around the Canadian's neck. Roode picks him up, wrapping the younger's legs around his waist and carrying him to the bed (because that's totally necessary), never breaking the kiss even when he sets Seth down.

Moving down to his neck, Roode places little kisses along the skin, pushing Seth's shirt up his torso. The Iowan lifts his shirt over his head, and brings Bobby's lips back to his own.

~

Dean throws his empty roll of tape at Roman once he comes out of the bathroom. The Samoan catches it with ease, raising his eyebrows in question. Dean shrugs his shoulders. He's bored, okay? Without Rollins here to make him suffer with his damn presence, or to glare at, he's got nothing else to do.

That sounds bad, in hindsight, but it's not that his whole life revolves around that back stabbing weasel (it doesn't). But this whole.. thing has thrown him for a loop, and he isn't sure what else to do.

He's a bit afraid to go online (if it isn't broken) because of what he could possibly see.

He's been wondering what that douche bag - Food? Mood? Whatever his name is - had been talking about. While Rollins never talked about his past, it couldn't of been that bad, could it? And what was all that other shit about?

Dean's got no idea what the hell went on here, but it sounds fucking shady.

Styles comes back into the room, saying goodnight to his wife.

Well, it's time to find out

~

Seth bucks up against Bobby's legs, rubbing his erection on the man's thigh. Roode unbuckles his belt, sliding the high flyer's jeans down his legs, slowly, teasingly. He moans, begging Bobby to hurry up.

"Why should I?" He asks, wearing a shit eating smirk.

"I n-need you." Seth pleads, his cock throbbing. It's been awhile since he last slept with someone, and Bobby's always been able to drive him wild. "Please, Bobby."

"Since you asked so nicely." Bobby teases, crawling up Seth's body. He grabs lube from the bedside table and coats his fingers with it. Kissing the Iowan silly, he presses in a finger.

~

"Hey." Styles greets, flashing Dean a smile. "Sorry 'bout leavin' ya alone like that. Kids waited up just to see me."

"How meet ya got?" The Lunatic Fringe asks. He loves kids so much.

"Four," Styles answers, "They're all basically the same age, except for the little girl we had last year."

"Shit, man." Roman snorts. "I have two and my wife already wants to run away to Mexico."

Styles laughs, "I'm sorry to say it doesn't get easier."

~

Seth takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself as Bobby moves his fingers. It becomes a struggle when he adds another, and then a third. Seth is breathing heavily, grinding down on the other's fingers.

"Oh, f-fuck, plea-se. I-I'm r-read-dy." The high flyer stutters, holding onto Bobby's biceps. The removal of his fingers causes Seth to whine, but the replacement of Bobby's dick rubbing at his hole..

Bobby gently slides in the head, and allows Seth time to adjust before he's thrusting in.

~

"It's worth it, though." A.J. points out.

The connection between them is really strong (not the Shield strong) and Dean finds it really comfortable to talk to the former TNA Superstar.

"So," Ambrose begins. Now or never, right? "What happened with our.. pal and.. that guy?"

"Tyler and Bobby Roode?" Styles asks, and Dean nods. So it's not Food? That's a shame. "It's - he never told y'all?"

"He's never said anything about his past, other than that his dad left when he was two." Roman replies, sitting on Dean's bed.

"Shit." A.J. shakes his head. "That's - it's a long story."

Dean shrugs, "We don't got anywhere to be tomorrow, right?"

~

Bobby's thrusts quicken, filling him up deeper. Seth is moaning his name, panting, cursing. The Canadian is kissing his neck and jaw, running his fingers through Seth's hair.

This is all so, so wrong. Bobby Roode is his enemy, his rival, a sleazy coward and back stabber.

Why does it feel so right?

"You're so f-fucking gorgeous." Bobby growls in his ear, pressing their chests together. "No one d-deserves to see you like this. Fuck, fuck." Seth opens his mouth to say something smart back, but all that comes out is a broken, high pitched moan when Bobby hits his prostate.

~

"We don't." Styles agrees, sinking onto his own bed. "It's gets really.. bad, towards the end.."

"Okay." Roman agrees.

"Well," Styles starts, rubbing the back of his neck. "Tyler was, like, nineteen when he came to TNA. Y'know, a youngin' with a bright future. He and Roode hit off immediately and became the best of friends.

"Tyler, Roode, and Frankie Kazarian formed a group called the Era of Revolution. They were brothers, but there was always somethin' special between Ty and Roode. Everyone knew, but it took them dopes a year to get together."

"Get together?" Roman repeats, eyebrows raised.

"Yeah.. in a relationship.. 'cause Roode's bi and Tyler's gay." Styles shakes his head. "He never said?"

"Nope."

Styles rolls his eyes. "That's - not the point. Anyways... They were together for two years before Roode turned on them."

~

"You're mine." Bobby growls, repeatedly slamming against his prostate. Seth cries out in pleasure. "You're _mine_."

"I'm g-gonna -"

"Come for me, baby."

Seth does, clenching around Bobby's cock as he rides out the most blissful orgasm he's had in years.

~

"No one ever expected it, and it broke Tyler - his heart and mind. Tyler was so stupidly in love with him.." Styles goes on. "He cried, locked himself away. Then Bobby started talkin'bout how it was all fake, he didn't really love Tyler - no one did - and he was just usin'im to make Ty vulnerable and weak so he could beat him for the TNA World Championship.

"Ty still had me, Jeff Hardy, Kaz, and Gail Kim and we tried to help him through it." Styles says. "Then, when Tyler was just 'bout to beat Roode to retain his title.. Kaz knocked him out and Roode won."

A.J. shakes his head. "That belt was his baby, and Kaz was his brother. Everythin' he loved was ripped away from him in one night."

~

Seth feels Bobby collapse beside him on the bed,but he can't look. His stomach is flip flopping, making him nauseous.

_What the hell did you just do?_

"That was.. nice, eh?"

Seth rubs his face. "This didn't happened."

"Sorry, sweetheart, but it did."

"No." Seth snaps, propping up onto his elbow. "No, it didn't, and you're not gonna tell anyone it did."

Bobby - no, his name is Roode. When did his brain change it? - holds up his hands in surrender. "Okay, okay. I won't tell anyone."

Seth sits up, gathering his clothes, "I'm taking a shower and then I'm leaving. Don't you _dare_ say a word to me."

Roode, surprisingly, does as he's told.

~

"If he wasn't messed up before, that night.." Styles sighs, "It completely destroyed him... He left not long after, and no one's really spoken to him since.."

Dean gulps past the lump forming in his throat. Damn, he honestly didn't expect that. Reaching out, he grabs his brother's shaking fist to calm him. The Samoan exhales shakily, trying to cool himself down.

Is that why Rollins destroyed the Shield? Because he was fucked up a long time ago? Because of trust issues?

~

Seth stands under the hot spray, scratching at his dirty, disgusting skin. He can feel Roode's hands all over him, and it suddenly doesn't turn him on anymore.

God, what the hell was he thinking? No, the better question is why _wasn't_ he thinking? He came over here to scream his frustrations away, possibly get into a fist fight.

How does he end up having sex? Only him - only Seth Rollins, class A idiot and worthless garbage, could pull something so stupid.

He stops scrubbing at his arms, seeing the skin is red, and just stands under the spray. The water relaxes the tension in his shoulder muscles, and allows him to actually breath again.

If A.J. ever found out about this, he'd be dead.

Seth turns the water off and steps out, toweling himself off. He sighs as he pulls on his clothes for the second time in about an hour.

Isn't he supposed to be an Architect? Coming up with fool proof strategies should be his specialty.

Well, it doesn't help when the only fool involved is him.

~

"I - wow." Dean says, scratching his head. Of all the things he was thinking of, that certainly wasn't it.

"I know." A.J. sighs again. "Look, I don't know what happened vetween y'all, but it seems like y'all trusted each other at one point and time. For Tyler to do that, for however long it lasted, is really big and.. maybe you should ease up on him a bit."

Roman gives him a pleading look - it screams "Yes, please!" because he's been trying to forgive Rollins since Wrestlemania - and Dean shrugs. He isn't ready to forgive (and he'll never forget) especially when Rollins never told them any of this.

He's still extremely suspicious.

~

Seth steps out into the hallway, looking both ways to make sure there's no one there. He slips into his jacket, and into his sandals before walking towards the elevator. He thanks God that it's empty.

He leans against the wall, staring up at the ceiling.

How could he have let himself fall for Roode's tricks again? Didn't he learn from the first time?

The doors open, and steps out. Once again, he thanks the Big Man for the hotel bar being empty. He couldn't stand being seen by anyone right now.

He feels so damn filthy.

How can he look A.J. in the face tomorrow? Will he have to tell his friend, or can he keep it a secret?

Will he be able to resist Roode's power over him? Or will this happen again?

He orders a glass of whiskey.

He's so fucked.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything. All characters used are property of their respective company; WWE and/or TNA. This story is completely fictional, and has never nor will ever happen. Any insults directed towards any superstar/diva/company/CEO is not my own opinion, nor it is intended to harm said corporation/person, but is used merely to enhance the plot. The title of this fic comes from the song Misery Loves My Company by Three Days Grace, which will serve as Tyler Black's TNA theme song. However, I don't own this song.**

**Warning: depression, anger management issues, a past rapethat will only be described in flashbacks, said one is drugged before rape occurs, alcoholism, past child abuse/neglect that will be referenced a lot, someone is lead on during a relationship**

**A/N: I'm a terrible person. I know this. You know this. Please don't hate on me too much in the comments. Thanks. I legit have no freaking idea what I'm doing here. I desperately need help. Ugh. If you have a Tumblr, please contact me on the link at the bottom if you're interested. If you don't have one, my e-mail is in my bio. You can email me to talkor email me your Kik. I don't care how, I just REALLY need some help writing this, I don't know what to do. If not, I totally understand. Anywho, thank you so much for reading despite my absence!**

Chapter Seven:

He decided he was going to say something about what happened later.

This whole.. thing would put a lot of unneeded stress on his friend's shoulders. A.J. overworries about him practically nonstop anways, no reason to expose that he's still under Roode's stupid hold and make it all a trillion times worse. At least, not until he has it under control.

Besides, it's not like Bobby will go out and broadcast it to the entire world on their next show - house or televised - that they did the unspeakable.

Right?

Whatever - he pushed the entire... incident, let's go with incident, out of his mind as he stumbled into the bedroom - more exhausted than drunk - and plunked down beside A.J. The older told him to go get changed, but Seth was already slipping into unconsciousness.

So, yeah. He was probably going to end up getting killed should the incident ever leak out (though it really, really shouldn't), but he can deal with that bridge when he crosses it.

He just.. he knows that A.J. will giv him this look of utter disappointment and be completely upset with him - "You should'a just stayed away from 'im. There was no reason to go'ver there and pick a fight ya can't win." - which is the exact opposite of what he needs.

Then Ambrose would laigh his ass off at him, call him nasty names and make fun of how weak he was, how he couldn't fight off the temptation of a guy who he hasn't seen in five years - the same guy who destroyed his heart.

Maybe... maybe Reigns would understand, he'd comfort Seth. Even when he didn't really need it, Roman used to always there to make him feel better, and it seems that it hasn't changed over the past year.

 _Telling one means telling them all. It doesn't matter how sweet and kind Roman would be to me, he'd never keep a secret from Ambrose. A.J. wouldn't be too happy about being the last to know, especially since he is technically my best friend._ His subconscious keeps him at bay from running over into the Samoan's arms and confessing all his sins - not just recently, but over the course of his entire life.

Of course, there's a lot he hasn't told them, so that'd take a lot of explaining to do.

A.J. hands him a cup of Starbucks coffee motions for him to move, so he takes a seat at the island in the miniature kitchen thing, followed momentarily by his friend.

A lot less hesitantly than the day before, Reigns and Ambrose sit across from them.

Huh. That's what you call progress.

"Last night I decided to fill in your forner allies -I don't care what ya call 'em, they were your allies - on your past. And I have to say, I'm really upset about the total lack of info you shared with 'em. Ou didn't even tell them you were gay? Really? What happened if ya ended up meetin' some guy at a bar. Do ya realize how awkward that would be?" A.J. rants. Seth opens him mouth to point out he had zero intentions of ever taking home a guy at he met at some sleezy bar for three reason - one; that's purely disgusting and who knows what kind of diseases he could have?, two; he'd probably spread that shit all over social media. Bye, bye WWE career, and three; his crush was a member of his stable and if he really wanted some, all he had to do was ask. Dean made it no secret that there was a mutual attraction between them, despite never saying it out loud.

He just wasn't sure he was ready to.move on from Bobby, then four years passed and suddenly they hate each other. Not entirely his fault.

Thankfully, A.J. keeps going before he can say all... that.

"But that's okay, because now, we're gonna open a trust circle. It opens by admittin' somethin' we're sorry for and confessin' somethin' you ain't ever said before. Is that clear?" A.J. asks. Reigns and Ambrose nod and mutter their okay's. He turns to Seth and narrows his eyes, an amused glint in them. "I expect you to be more honest than anyone."

Rollins holds up his hands in defense. He was an excellent liar if he had to be, but he will abide by A.J.'s rules because that's what good friends do.

"I would like to start by apologizin' for Tyler bein' such an asshole and a bad friend."

"Hey!"

"Shut up, it ain't your turn." The Phenomenal One scolds. What was the point of this game if they were just gonna insult him? "I would also like to add that, while he may be a gigantic idiot about just nearly everythin' he does, he does get stupider."

"How is this helping?"

"We're bondin' over our agreement that you do a lot of stupid shit. I like to think you'll get better, you haven't so far. See? Progress." Seth just rolls his eyes and lets the conversation go.

"Well," Roman starts, looking rather uncomfortable, "I guess I'll go ahead and say I'm sorry for my behavior since this thing started. Being close to you hurts like.. all the time. Not because of what you did, but because I missed you. It didn't matter that you turned your back on us, because you were still our little brother. I wanted to forgive you after Wrestlemania."

Seth feels tears prick his eyes, causing him to shudder. Well, fucking hell. He's missed his brothers, especially Roman, for so long. To think he could've had them back is... is...

"I'm sorry your such a dick."

" _Dean_."

The brunette rolls his eyes. " _Fine_. I'm sorry for bein' such a bitch that I couldn't forgive ya till now. Ya really hurt me not with what ya did, but with what you said after the fact. Especially the first interview with Cole. That... that stung more cause the wound was still fresh and it dug the knife deeper."

Struggling to hold back the tears, Seth finds himself completely overcome by raw emotion. He knew he hurt his former family members, but not to this extent.

He figured they'd be over the hurt by now, that it would be all anger and hatred.

He was wrong. Oh, so, wrong.

"There's a lot of shit I should apologize for." The Iowan exhales deeply. "But, Dean, I'm really sorry I put your head through cinder blocks."

Ambrose snorts, looking mildly amused, while A.J. sputters beside him.

" _Why would you put his head through cinder blocks?_ "

"I'm a dick sometimes." Seth's mind starts to go through all the stuff that's happened over the last year or so, including last night, and it makes him choke up. Fucking hell. How could he have been such a terrible person and be okay with it? He's -he's -

He's no better than Roode, but wasn't that his goal?

Well, mission accomplished.

"Gotta keep the cycle goin' Ty or else we'll never reach our goal." He hears A.J. say it, but it's a muffled sound drowned out by Bobby's words from last night.

_You're mine._

"I, um, I " Seth shudders, feeling his skin crawl as _he_ rubs his hands all over Seth's body.

He shakes it off. Now isn't the right time.

"I.. I never wanted to betray you guys." Seth says, his voice wobbly. "Hunter came to me and said one of us had to do it. I knew neither of you would go for it, so I just went ahead and said yes then. I've just been emulating myself after.. after him ever since then. Figured that if my job was to shake you guys up - not that I want to - then it would be best to act like someone who fucked me up really bad, y'know?"

A.J. grabs his hand, drawing circle on his palms.

Roman is up instantly, walking over to Seth and throwing his arms over the other man. He lets himself become engulfed into the Samoan's familiar smell and warmth as the first tear slides down his chest.

He hears the door slam shut.

~

Dean has not been _this_ pissed off in a long time.

Who the hell does that - that.. that _guy_ think he fucking is? Prince Caspian? Captain Jack Sparrow?

This prick isn't some seemingly invincible heroine with shockingly good looks, an amazing sense of humor, and the ability to choose between right and wrong when most people during their time frame can not.

If Food - or whatevwr his stupid name is - decided to use then break someone as beautiful and wonderful as Seth, then he has to have something messed up in his head or his ways are really fucking twisted.

Dean remembers overhearing Food's name and the room number from an earlier conversation he eavesdropped on while he was taking a break from Roman and A.J. (he's really bad with names, numbers were always his specialty. He wasn't called the titty master for nothing.)

He pounds on the fucker's door until he answers and shoves his way inside.

"Can I help you?"

Dean snarls, grabbing two fistfuls of the asshole's shirt and pushing him against the wall. His blood boils as he looks at this guy's face wondering what Seth possibly could've saw in him.

Saw what he couldn't see in Dean.

"I don't know what the hell your problem is, but you better stay the fuck away from _my Seth Rollins_. I've already claimed him," Dean growls, barring his teeth, "You were a real fucking dick to him in the past for no damn reason. You fucked up when ya did that. He's moved on from your stupid ass, and you need to leave him be before I shove my boot so far up your ass you'll never be able to get it out."

The asshole's lips turn up at the corner, and he chuckles softly. "Moved on? No, I don't think he has. He knows how much he loves it when I took him - how I can make him squirm without doing anything. He'll be back. He always comes back."

"You've never had the pleasure of being with him, eh?" Mcfuckface questions, raising his eyebrows. Dean just tightens his hold. "I thought not. However, if you'd like to share, I could always come up with a reasonable price. Seth is quiet expensive because he's so valuable on the market. A lot of people would die for a taste of that glorious ass."

Dean sees red.

Then he sees asshole laying on the ground and a sharp stinging in his knuckles.

He crouches down, grabbing a fistful of his shirt.

"Seth isn't some fancy piece of fuckin' art. He's a human being - a beautiful, mostly kind, and warm hearted human being. Or, he was before you royally fucked him up." Dean snarls. "If you _ever_ think about hurting my boy again, the consequences will be severe."

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, come follow me on Tumblr  
> teamambrollins23.tumblr.com


End file.
